[Am-info] Gates Calls On Microsoft To Embrace 'Trustworthy Computing'

[John Bryan]

Found this over at www.bbspot.com. It's a good laugh.

Virus Responsible for Gates Security Memo
By Brian Briggs

Redmond, WA - An embarrassed Bill Gates admitted today that a memo 
outlining Microsoft's new focus on security called Trustworthy Computing 
was sent out in error when an idealistic intern sent him the fanciful, 
pie in the sky report in a virus infected e-mail.
Trustworthy?

"I forgot to patch my Outlook Express and it went out to my entire 
address book," said Gates. "You would think that if anything were to get 
us to focus on security in our software that it would be a gaffe like 
this. To ensure security in all our software, however, would mean 
dropping half of our product lines and I have a fiscal responsibility to 
shareholders."

Gates added, "Don't we run drug tests on interns?"

The memo was apparently drafted by college intern Glenn Hardcastle in 
case Microsoft ever did decide to make security a priority. "They told 
me it was busy work. That it would never happen," said Glen, "When I saw 
it on the net the next day I didn't even bother going into work. I knew 
my ass was grass for the big Gates-mower."

Many consumers were also relieved to hear that Microsoft's priorities 
had not changed. "I was a little worried when I heard that security 
would be a priority over new features. I was really excited when I heard 
that in the next version of Windows I'll be able to transfer money 
between my bank accounts with a simple click from any computer connected 
to the Internet. I thought for sure that feature would be scrapped in 
favor of 'security'," said Jack Yager.

"I checked my calendar to make sure it wasn't April 1st when the e-mail 
dropped into my inbox," said AP tech reporter Donna Whitlock. "I mean 
come on, Microsoft and trustworthy go together about as well as Exxon 
and sea otters. I'm glad to see it was all a big mistake."

John B
--
johnb@austin.rr.com                 johnbryan@mac.com
http://home.austin.rr.com/johnb     http://homepage.mac.com/johnbryan

On Thursday, January 17, 2002, at 12:28  PM, madodel@ptdprolog.net wrote:

> Already reported here, but here's ComputerWorld's take on m$'s latest 
> scam
> - "trustworthy computing"  Like asking a convicted rapist to babysit 
> your
> daughter.  Oh well it will play well for the pointy headed suits.
>
> From: Computerworld_Daily@Computerworld.com
>
> Gates calls on Microsoft to embrace 'trustworthy computing'
>
> Bill Gates, Microsoft's chairman and chief software architect, has 
> issued
> a call
>  to the software giant's 49,000 employees worldwide asking them to make
> "trustworthy computing" the company's highest priority.
>
> http://computerworld.com/nlt/1%2C3590%2CNAV47_STO67461_NLTAM%2C00.html
>
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